JERUSALEM – Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu has congratulated Prince Andrew for reaffirming the role of honor in public affairs, The Kibbitzer has learned.
“In my capacity as Chairman of the Society of Honorable Israeli Thieves (SHIT) I congratulate you for putting gentlemanly honor ahead of raped teens and other such inconsequential issues,” Netanyahu wrote in a letter that was hand delivered to the prince today by the Israeli ambassador to London.
“It is a necessary corrective to those of who would have us concern ourselves with pedophilia, mendacity, incitement to racism and other such preoccupations of the unwashed classes.”
‘I myself have been the butt of the sort of crude accusations that you are facing,” Netanyahu continued. “Please know that my gentle wife and I fully support you and will testify that you were sharing a pizza with us, should that be necessary.”
Sources in Buckingham Palace told The Kibbitzer that the prince’s response on receiving the missive was “What do I need this Jew shit for? Do you know how much crap I got into for mixing with someone named Epstein?”