Categories
Satire

‘We Were Schlonged!’

An email exchange between Jacob Zuma and Bibi Netanyahu, by Jeremy Gordin and Roy Isacowitz

With the Permission of Politicsweb

Private and Confidential

To: Donald J Trump, Benjamin Netanyahu.

Fr: Gedleyihlekisa Zuma.

Bcc: JF Gordin.

Dear Donny and Bibi:

“Lovely party, super people, must fly, toodles.”

That is what I would have written on my Twitter thing if I were allowed access to my phone. But eish, my lawyers, they boss me around all the time, unlike yours, and they won’t allow me to keep the umshini iPhone.

They say this funny umlungu, the one who keeps following us around, Carl Niehaus, must keep the phone. The police would never accost a white man, they say, especially one wearing camouflage. Only Julius Malema, the cheeky little scoundrel, would do that.

Categories
Kibbitz

On Track for American Fascism?

As I write, Joe Biden seems to be doddering to an excruciatingly close victory in the US election. That result, if it comes about, will be litigated furiously by Donald Trump and – depending on the success of his litigation – it could well be fought in the streets.

Having been liberated from the shackles of democracy by the words and actions of their leader, the Proud Boys and other simple-minded jingoists are unlikely to accept the authority of judges any more than that of vote counters and assessors. If things are looking ugly now, they could soon get a whole lot worse.