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Trump Expects Election Day Miracle From Netanyahu

Plummeting precipitously in the polls, Donald Trump has reached out to the one man who knows how to pull an election out of the hat, The Kibbitzer has learned.

The Prime Minister’s Bureau in Jerusalem confirmed that Benjamin Netanyahu had agreed to advise Trump on an unpaid basis, excluding travel expenses for the entire Netanyahu family, meals at select restaurants around the world and a life-long supply of premier Cuban cigars.

“He’s already advised the candidate to go on nationwide TV on election day and warn that the Muslims are flocking to the polls in droves,” a senior member of Trump’s campaign team told The Kibbitzer.

He has also advised Trump to focus on the ethnic cleansing of white Americans in the country’s inner cities and to blame “Mufti Obama” for the incipient holocaust facing the white race in America.

A source in Netanyahu’s inner circle said the prime minister was expected to propose that Trump hire Israeli Police Commissioner Roni Alsheich as his adviser on police shooting of black youths.

“Alsheich has cut his teeth on the Ethiopians, so dealing with the blacks should be a cinch,” the source said.