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Corrupt Politicians Disassociate Selves from Netanyahu

The current police investigation of Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu on various suspicions of corruption has elicited an irate email to Attorney General Avihai Mendelblit from the Association of Corrupt Israeli Politicians (ACIP).

“The current investigation of Netanyahu puts us in a very awkward spot,” ACIP wrote to the Attorney General.

“People are beginning to think that we, too, dabbled in Cuban cigars and first class flights with nights in luxury hotels. Nothing could be further from the truth.”

“We demand that you clarify publicly that the prime minister is an amateur and dilettante and is in no way associated with our professional organization.”

ACIP added that the organization has “high standards” and does not condone “petty malfeasance by wannabe corrupt politicians.”

“We deal in big-time graft involving high-value real estate, Greek islands and the like,” ACIP wrote. “We refuse to have our name sullied by a small-time shnorer.”

The email was signed by ACIP board member Ehud Olmert, Aryeh Deri, Avraham Hirschson, Shlomo Benizri and Ariel Sharon (honorary).