THE KIBBITZER

A legendary Jewish organization broke its 120-year silence today to criticize the QAnon conspiracy theory, reportedly the intellectual and spiritual home of the patriots who ransacked the US Capitol last week.

“We have long believed that silence is the best policy, but the grandiose and totally unjustified claims of the QAnon faithful have left us with no option but to go public,” the Elders of Zion said in a press release sent to major news outlets in the US, Russia and Moldova.

As a public service, The Kibbitzer is publishing an old but pertinent article from its archives.

April 17, 1924 (LANDSBERG PRISON, BAVARIA) – This baroque fortress of a prison some 40 miles south-west of Munich today houses Herr Adolf Hitler, the unlikely leader of the so-called “beerhall putsch” last November during which 20 people were killed.

Largely unknown before the putsch, Herr Hitler is now regarded by many on the right as the man who, once he completes his prison term, will save Germany from the Weimar swamp and the treasonous media and elites who populate it.

In this exclusive interview from within the forbidding walls of the prison, a relaxed and confident Herr Hitler told The Kibbitzer – the only news outlet to talk to him since his arrest – what prompted him to lead some 2,000 of his followers into the street in an attempt to overthrow the government.

An email exchange between Jacob Zuma and Bibi Netanyahu, by Jeremy Gordin and Roy Isacowitz

With the Permission of Politicsweb

Private and Confidential

To: Donald J Trump, Benjamin Netanyahu.

Fr: Gedleyihlekisa Zuma.

Bcc: JF Gordin.

Dear Donny and Bibi:

“Lovely party, super people, must fly, toodles.”

That is what I would have written on my Twitter thing if I were allowed access to my phone. But eish, my lawyers, they boss me around all the time, unlike yours, and they won’t allow me to keep the umshini iPhone.

They say this funny umlungu, the one who keeps following us around, Carl Niehaus, must keep the phone. The police would never accost a white man, they say, especially one wearing camouflage. Only Julius Malema, the cheeky little scoundrel, would do that.

The dirty washing that Sara Netanyahu had laundered in Washington last week consisted of PPE from Ichilov Hospital and items of clothing left behind by Balfour Street demonstrators, the First and Only Lady said in a statement issued this morning.

“I normally wash the protesters’ clothing by hand in the bathtub before ironing it and handing it back,” the statement quoted her as saying. “But it was essential that I go make peace with the IUD and Burundi so I decided to do it in Washington instead.”

Israel’s Alternate Prime Minister Benny Gantz is recovering well from the emergency back surgery he underwent on Wednesday, the Sheba Medical Center spokesman has announced.

Gantz’ spine-stiffening procedure took over five hours and involved the implant of titanium rods to create the type of backbone not normally found in politicians, the spokesman said.

First contemplated earlier this year as elective surgery, the operation was upgraded to an emergency procedure following Gantz’s cringing and sycophantic performance since he took office.

“Such spinelessness is not something a people can live with for any length of time,” said Dr. Netanel Mayersohn, the surgeon who performed the operation.

“It not only impacts life-style, but life itself. Humans can’t function adequately without any sort of backbone whatsoever.”

“I wish Benny a full recovery,” said Foreign Minister Gabi Ashkenazi. Gantz’s Blue & White Party colleague. “If it helps him get up from the carpet after Bibi has stepped all over him, I may consider having one myself.”